Accept that You Have an Eating Problem, Not a Weight Problem

Time after time, people tell me that they have a "weight problem". This perception gives rise to a huge misunderstanding that damages even the most earnest efforts toward weight loss and weight maintenance. If you make this same claim - "I have a weight problem" - I'd argue that, no, you don't have a weight problem at all; rather, you have an eating problem. Now say it to yourself: "I have an eating problem." See how different that feels? Eating is what you're doing that's problematic. Weight is only the result of the eating. You can't change the weight without changing the eating.

Most diets use only one measuring stick for progress: the scale. You go on the diet, you step on the scale, and you see if you've lost the weight or gained weight. If you've lost weight, you're thrilled. If you've gained weight, you feel let down. The number on the dial is all that seems to matter.

This cycle of measurement sets you up for trouble. First of all, the scale doesn't tell the whole story. It focuses only on your weight, not on your behaviors that create the weight. Second, focusing on the scale simply substitutes one obsessive "high" for another. In the past, you got your "high" from food; now you're getting your "high" from weight loss. But the weight loss is risky because it sets you up for disappointment. When your weight loss slows, your "high" bursts like a bubble. Here's the truth: the scale doesn't really tell you enough about what you're doing, and it's not a good device for fostering change.

But if you don't use the scale as a measuring stick, how can you judge if you're doing well or poorly? My recommendation: judge yourself by your behavior. And to judge your behavior accurately, you need a better, more effective "device" for recording your actions, understanding the consequences of your actions, and choosing different actions in the future.

p. 56-57 Structure House Book, by Gerald Musante.